Ageism and the Modern Woman

After turning 50, I started noticing something - Something trivial, but still annoying. Advertisers apparently no longer spoke to me, a 50 something, empty nester woman. The only commercials and ads directed to my generation seem to be Viagra, Cialis, those horrible undergarments with that catchy twist tune, and numerous other pharmaceutical products that will take care of my urinary incontinence and depression.  

Heck, even so called “anti-aging” products use stunningly gorgeous 27 year old models that wouldn’t know an age spot or wrinkle unless it bit her on her butt. Seriously. Guess what advertisers? Just today I used shampoo and conditioner, soap and razors. I’m wearing makeup. I did the dishes and washed two loads of clothes. I filled my car tank with gas yesterday, after shopping at Target (another advertiser who seems to think that only 25 year old girls shop there). Shampoo commercials only show young girls with long tresses, shining and blowing in the wind (after they’ve tied their hair into some ridiculous knot or something). Laundry detergent commercials always center on a young family with unruly kids smearing popsicles or pudding or mud all over themselves. They should see my husband’s grimy clothes after he’s mowed the lawn; now that would be quite the demonstration!

When a 50 plus year old woman, or man for that matter, is used in advertising or media, it’s either for the above mentioned Cialis ad, or they’re made out to be a buffoon who can’t negotiate the internet or their smartphone. Those “funny” parental text memes? Yeah, they’re offensive. Mom’s and Dad’s are stupid y’all! LOLz.  Whatever. Remember seeing the SNL skit featuring Sally O’Mally? The message? If you’re 50 you must be obnoxious and wear stretchy jumpsuits!

But most 50 something year old women I know are pretty amazing. Accomplished. Hilarious. Active.  We’re conservative, liberal, educated, parents, grandparents, wives, divorcees or widows. We’re caretakers to our aging parents, sandwiched between time spent with our children and grandchildren. We’re people. We matter. We have value.

* Like my friend Robin, who works out like a fiend, has the body of a 25 year old, can sing better than most girls from Nashville, organizes giant charity events and wears slammin’ stilettos like it’s nobody’s business.

* Or my amazing girlfriends Terri and Lynn who I had the pleasure of spending a leisurely few days with last week. We danced to JLo, sang at the top of our lungs, and had more fun than you can imagine. Terri mentors pageant contestants and Lynn is one of the most dynamic women I know. (just don’t take her high heels away from her, she will cut you)

* My friend Judy, who is a talented, accomplished artist.

* Her sister Sandy who is not only a breast cancer survivor, but a barrel racer!

* My facebook friend Denise, whose sense of humor has seen her through hard times and the long distance separation from her grown son.

* My friends Donna and Judy, who created a wine beverage that sells like crazy, employ and empower other women, and generously give back to their community.

* Carla, who survived kidney disease, and is an amazing mom and example to her wonderful son.

* My former teacher Connie, who is a diehard Jimmy Buffet fan and  an incredible example of resilience, and is one of the coolest women I know.

* Me? I know how to use the “interweb” and am proficient in Adobe Photoshop, Word, Excel and Quickbooks. I navigate social media and embrace and enjoy using Instagram, facebook and Twitter. I’m a wife and a new grandmother.

We aren’t caricatures, and  wouldn’t be caught dead in a red stretchy jumpsuit if our lives depended on it! We lived through the 80’s, been there, done that!

Yes, I’m older- maybe even wiser. (Maybe) But I’m tired of being insulted. So here’s to my sisters. All of you, because even if you’re not here yet, you will be one day! (Sooner than you think), and I hope that the existing ageism in our society is dead and gone by then, along with pharmaceutical ads and Viagra commercials!

(I’d love for you to give a shout out to your favorite fabulous 50 something woman!)

Springtime on the Chute

SPRINGTIME ON THE CHUTE (and tequila)

chute  

/SHo͞ot/

Noun A sloping channel or slide for conveying things to a lower level. In other words, it's a creek, a ditch, a drain...whatever. It's interesting and kind of pretty, in a Louisiana kind of way. I'm sure in the summer it will be a haven for skeeters and such, but for now, we're enjoying it. There's lots of interesting wildlife here. Birds I'm not familiar with, and weeds and wildflowers galore. I have no idea what kind of bird this little dude is. He's quite vocal and hangs out on the ground. If you are a bird person, please let me know! He's driving Daisy crazy! LOL A few more views of the chute and birds below... I think these are Sandpipers. Maybe? Some kind of tall white water bird shown below. Like I said...I really need a bird person to help me identify all these birds! In the afternoons and evenings we love to hang out on our patio and enjoy the nature show!   This past weekend was chilly, but we didn't let it keep us inside. We grilled out, then huddled under blankets and relaxed. We made THE MOST DELICIOUS grilled chicken on Friday night, then for Cinco de Mayo, we used the same marinade recipe and grilled flank steak. SO GOOD! We served the flank steak with a black bean and corn salsa. Oh, and did I mention the marinade recipe contains tequila? Oh yeah. We've also discovered Mission Artisanal Tortillas in Flax and Blue Corn. So much better than a plane old flour tortilla!  So, by special request, here is the marinade recipe and the salsa recipe as well. Note: We cut the recipe in half for the chicken breasts, since we just had two. We followed the recipe for the flank steak.  Tequila Marinade  1/2 cup clear tequila Juice of 2 large lemons, freshly squeezed (look for Meyer lemons, they're awesome) 1/4 cup orange juice 1 tsp. chili powder 1 seeded and diced jalapeno 3-4 cloves garlic minced 1/2 tsp red pepper flakes Mix all ingredients together. Place meat in ziploc bag or shallow baking dish and marinate for at least 6 hours in your refrigerator. Make sure the meat is well coated with the marinade. Preheat your grill, and prepare the grate with oil, so the chicken or steak won't stick. Grill chicken until golden about ten minutes per side, depending on your grill and the size of the chicken. Grill flank steak on HIGH for 7 minutes on one side, 5 minutes on the other side. Then remove from the grill, tent with aluminum foil and let the meat rest for 5 to 10 minutes. Slice and serve with tortillas and Black Bean and Corn Salsa. Black Bean and Corn Salsa 1 can drained and rinsed black beans 1 can Mexicorn, drained 1 can RoTel tomatoes drained (I use the original style) 1 jalapeno pepper, seeded and diced 3 Tbsp. extra virgin olive oil Juice of one large lime 1/4 cup clear tequila 1 tsp. cumin 1/4 tsp garlic powder 1 bunch cilantro, chopped (optional) 1 avocado sliced or chopped. Mix all ingredients together, and chill in refrigerator for several hours before serving. Enjoy!

TRUSTING GOD...AND COMFORT ZONES

So here I am...in Egypt. Not really. But it feels like it at times. Away from my family. Away from my friends. Away from the job I loved. Away from the place that I knew as "home". Out of my comfort zone. It's been an adjustment.
Adjusting to my new house has been interesting. I keep losing stuff that I unpacked when I was in an exhausted daze. I'll remember where something was in the old house, but have absolutely no clue where it is in our new house. I can't remember what I got rid of, and what I kept. Seriously. I was in a daze. Try moving two weeks before Christmas. I do not recommend it to anyone! Ever!
Adjusting to my new city has been an adventure. It's been fun trying new restaurants, new shops, new grocery stores.I'm starting to learn my way around, finding shortcuts and different routes around town. I just keep wishing my "old" friends were here to experience it all with me.
Adjusting to a new church is difficult. We were already searching for a new church home before we moved. We just hadn't landed anywhere, so we were in a state of "church limbo" for awhile. We've visited two churches here, and think we've finally found a church we'll be able to call home. It's close to our neighborhood, so I hope I can be as involved there as I used to be at FBC, back in the day. We've joined a class that we like, so we will be moving our letter there in a few weeks.
I've joined Bible Study Fellowship. The study this year has been on Genesis, and oh my goodness, it's just what I needed. God has spoken to me so loudly and clearly. The verse (Genesis 26:3) in the photo above literally brought me to my knees when I read it. God gave me His confirmation that we are right where He wants us to be.  I don't know why. It really doesn't matter. It's out of my comfort zone, but we're here. Together. Just one more leg in our journey. We've now moved 13 times in our almost 31 years of marriage. We were just blessed to take a nice long pit stop in Texarkana for 18 of those years. I've also learned in Genesis how Joseph endured incredible hardship and pain, but never lost his faith, keeping his focus on God. He looked for God, and trusted God in his circumstances, never allowing himself to have a pity party. (I've lost count of how many pity parties I've had) So, like Joseph, I'm going to bloom where I'm planted and try to be a blessing to others.
So I have a new view. A fresh new life. Winter is over, Spring is here..
Now go and bloom where you're planted!

Leaving My Heart In Texarkana: Letting Go

Tonight will be the last night we spend in our Texarkana house. It's a bittersweet turning point for us. This old house has nurtured us, and we've so many wonderful memories here. 
We've experienced first days of school, and graduations. Homecomings, dances, and proms. Birthday parties, and barbecues. Ice storms and  hail storms. First dates, and broken hearts. Learning to drive, and wrecks. Broken bones, concussions, and surgeries. Basketball, Baseball, Softball, Football, Volleyball. Going to college and graduating college!! Engagements, showers, and two weddings!! Our patio and backyard evolved from a baseball diamond and volleyball court to a relaxing patio perfect for wine and candlelight. We've opened and closed a business, and experienced the heartache and disappointment when it didn't work out quite the way we wanted it to. Through all of that, this house on Williamsburg was our haven, and our port in the storm.
And this town embraced and accepted and loved us, from the moment we arrived in 1994. Our home church at FBC was the perfect place to raise our children, and we made so many wonderful friends there. Pleasant Grove was the best school we could have chosen for Amanda and Greg, and we are forever thankful for the amazing teachers and coaches they had there.

And now we let go. At the Christmas concert Sunday night, Danny Gokey talked about letting go, and quoted Romans 8:27-29: And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. 

Everything that's happened to us here in Texarkana, and all of our experiences, both good and bad, have shaped us and prepared us for this. So we're stepping out in faith, and trusting God, and we know that He's leading us right where He wants us to be. We know that we have new friends, new memories and new experiences waiting for us in our new home.

(but I leave a little piece of my heart here in Texarkana)

Much love to you all!

Andy

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. 

Memories

I'm cleaning, and cleaning, and cleaning. And organizing, and packing and staging. Trouble is, I keep getting sidetracked by my knick-knacks and the memories attached to them. I'm a saver. I save things.Some worth saving, some SO not worth saving!  I saved a Lego Santa that Greg made me years ago. (worth saving). A bunch of keys I have no idea what they go to! (not worth saving-or maybe they are???) Pictures, pictures, pictures. (worth saving) Lotions and potions and creams and gels and makeup and sprays, six trashbags full to be exact. (not worth saving)


Now I've moved on to the kitchen/living areas of the house. I've packed away lots of framed pictures today, because that's what all the staging pros and HGTV says you're supposed to do. "de-personalizing" it's called. Yep. That's exactly what it is. Anyway, I found a stash of notes and cards from my precious Mom. So glad I saved those! (We should write more real notes these days, and send less emails and texts! Just my opinion.) Inside one of those notes I found this printed poem, with a note from my Mom thanking me for being her precious daughter. What an honor to be hers. As I wipe away the tears, I thought I'd share it with you...

 Two Mothers Remembered

by Joann Snow Duncanson

I had two Mothers - two Mothers I claim
Two different people, yet with the same name.

Two separate women, diverse by design,
But I loved them both because they were mine.

The first was the Mother who carried me here,
Gave birth and nurtured and launched my career.

She was the one whose features I bear,
Complete with the facial expressions I wear.

She gave me her love, which follows me yet,
Along with the examples in life that she set.

As I got older, she somehow younger grew,
And we'd laugh as just Mothers and daughters should do.

But then came the time that her mind clouded so,
And I sensed that the Mother I knew would soon go.

So quickly she changed and turned into the other,
A stranger who dressed in the clothes of my Mother.

Oh, she looked the same, at least at arm's length,
But now she was the child and I was her strength.

We'd come full circle, we women three,
My Mother the first, the second and me.

And if my own children should come to a day,
When a new Mother comes and the old goes away.

I'd ask of them nothing that I didn't do.
Love both of your Mothers as both have loved you.

So. It's inevitable. I'm about to turn fifty. Five-Oh. Uh-Oh. I'm usually very laid back about birthdays. But this one, well....this one hurts. Not sure why. Well. Actually I think I do know why. It sounds old. Fifty. Many of my friends have already pushed that envelope, and in a really good way. I've got some dang good lookin' friends. Men and Women who make Fifty look like child's play. Physically fit, active, stylish, fun loving. They're setting a wonderful example for me as I approach my birthday.

It's really remarkable how quickly time seems to pass now. Especially from my 20's on. During my 20's I was having and raising my babies. Moved 11 times. In my 30's I was a "Stay at Home Mom", doing the classroom Mom, Sunday School teacher, PTA volunteer thing. In my 40's I've partnered with my husband and opened, operated, and sadly, closed the business. I've gone to work full time, leaving the "housewife" part of my life behind. My kids have completed their education, begun their careers and married the loves of their lives. I'm sure that one day they'll be startled to find that they too have watched the years stream by quickly.

I know enough now to know that I will never know it all. That as cliche as it sounds, we're never through learning. That there is ALWAYS something more to do, to learn. I KNOW that God has a plan for me, and that He's preparing a way for me to accomplish His plans. I know that I'm a poor sinner, but that my life experiences, good and bad, have all shaped me and helped make me who I am now and who I will be as I grow even older (hopefully).

I know that the best decision I ever made probably seemed like the most foolish, when I married John almost 30 years ago at the tender age of 20. He's the love of my life, more handsome at 50 than he was at 20. He's been the best husband, the best father, my anchor and my security. What a blessing.

This has been quite a ramble. But if you know me, you know that's just how I roll. I'm not ready for a rocking chair. I still want to drive my convertible Mustang (fast) with the top down and my hair blowing in the wind. I want to travel, but don't have the time. I want to spend MORE TIME with the ones I love, because I'm finding that really is the only thing that matters to me anymore. I don't have an actual bucket list, but there are things I hope to do: go to Hawaii, see a Packers game in Green Bay, take an Alaskan cruise, go to Italy. I hope one day to have an incredible relationship with my future grandchildren, and that they will KNOW me and love me. See, I've got a long way to go and a short time to get there, as the song goes. Happy Birthday to me, and thanks for reading...

Andy

 

NiftySwank: Doing vs. Waiting

:

NiftySwank: Doing vs. Waiting

And my problem is in the waiting. I just might possibly be the most IMPATIENT woman on the planet. I want things, and I want them now. I want results, and I want them now. Which is weird, considering I'm also the Queen of Procrastination. Weird, much?

Cheryl's Recipe Archives: Earthquake Cake - Two Versions

Cheryl's Recipe Archives: Earthquake Cake - Two Versions
Definitely going to have to try this recipe soon! Sounds delish!

Lately

Winter. 2012. I love that time right after Christmas, when you un-decorate your home, put all the shiny baubles and glittery ornaments away. Dust everything off, rearrange your décor. Just seems like everything looks new again. And clean. For a minute or two anyway.



Since Christmas, we’ve had some company (Tony and Carrie and kids) gone back to work, rearranged the furniture, and attended the best wedding reception/New Year’s Eve party evah! I’ve started back on my treadmill, though not religiously yet. Trying folks. Trying! I’ve become obsessed with Pinterest, and I’m determined to try new crafts and projects that I find there, not just pin them. The winter garden is producing a bit, some carrots and lettuces. Especially arugula. I’m now obsessed with Arugula. LOVE IT!

I’ve also read the entire Hunger Games series of books. Tore right through them from the comfort of my throne, I mean chair, on my handy dandy ipad. Have to say it’s nice not having to trot off to the bookstore. I love the ease, and let’s face it, laziness of just downloading a book!

There are sure to be lots of changes for us this year. Last year was a downer. We’re determined to roll with the changes this year. Keep us in your prayers. All of us, Schwartzes and Players. We’ll be needing them. Prayers for patience, and peace, and wisdom and strength.


So here’s a few pics from this month. The wedding reception, a bit of Valentine’s and spring décor. A few of Tony and Carrie’s visit. And a few of a fabulous chicken dinner I made a few nights ago.

This chair is my royal throne. I read, relax, watch tv and pin, pin, pin, all from the comfort of my throne!

 The following recipe is courtesy of Coolio!

Coolio’s Fall Off the Bone Chicken

(adapted by me)

4 lbs Chicken thighs and drumsticks

1tsp seasoned salt

½ tsp. fresh ground black pepper

¾ cup balsamic vinegar

4 cloves garlic, diced

1 medium yellow onion, chopped

1 (4.5oz) can chopped green chilis

1 can condensed cream of chicken & mushroom soup

1 green pepper

1 red pepper

Preheat oven to 400.

Place chicken in a large bowl with chopped onion and peppers. Sprinkled with the seasoned salt and pepper. In another bowl, mix together the vinegar, garlic, green chilis, and soup. Pour over the chicken and mix well. Pour all into a large 9x13 baking dish, making sure the the chicken is well coated with the soup mixture. Bake all for 50 to 60 minutes, until the chicken is almost falling off the bone.

I served this with quinoa, and used the juices from the chicken as gravy. Holy cow! It’s yummy!

I’m thinking this would be easy to do in the crock pot as well.

Schwartz Family Christmas

Peppermint Dots Christmas Card

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Christmas Stuff

Thought I'd share a few photos of our Christmas decorations. It's still a work in progress. Actually, I usually decorate until it's time to take it all down! I'm always tweaking and rearranging things. Because I'm crazy like that. I'll try to add more in a few days. After I've tweaked some more! Even though we're empty nesters, I still enjoy decorating for Christmas. It makes me feel festive to have the music on, the fire lit and the lights burning brightly. I went for a red and lime green theme this year. It's just so dang perky and fun!

Even Daisy gets into the Christmas spirit!
Cheers!
Andy

Oregon 2011

I made a little slideshow of our wonderful vacation to Oregon. We had so much fun!! It was just what we needed after several long months of stress and heartbreak. I was almost nervous before we left. I LOVE Oregon so much, and I was hoping that John would too. Thankfully he did! It was cool, rainy and so very refreshing. Eddy and John were perfect hosts, showing us their beloved city and state. We also decided before we left, that for once in our lives, we would fly FIRST CLASS. Oh my goodness, it's AWESOME!! Wine, food, and leg room makes for a wonderful flight! Enjoy the slideshow!

Create a free picture slideshow

Feeling all fallish and crafty and stuff

Pinterest is my new favorite obsession. It's the only place on the web where you can waste hours (really!) getting all inspired to be crafty and creative, only to realize that you've wasted the day away and actually don't have time now to do all the things you've discovered there.
So I found this cute idea on Pinterest, and decided I'd give it a whirl. It turned out okay! Yay me! So here's a gander at my Pinterest inspired front porch decor:

Also made a wreath and planted some mums. Now if only the weather would cooperate and feel "fallish" too!

Holiday Wish List

It's not too early to think about the 2011 Holiday Season! (and yes, I know that it's still 105 in Texas!) Just think refreshing thoughts of cold weather, hot chocolate and peppermints! There! Feel better now?So...How will you decorate? Are your Christmas decorations looking stale, bedraggled, and otherwise chewed up and gnarly?
Freshen up your Holiday decor with beautifully festive pieces from Willow House! You can view the catalog and shop online at my website! Come on! Christmas isn't that far away!

Weekly Deals!

This week's Willow House Weekly Deals are posted on my website. Here's a little sneak peek!

The Southern Living Homestyle Cookbook is just $9.96, this week only. Click that link and order your copy today.  Stock up for Christmas gifts, hostess gifts, bunco gifts, and of course, a gift for yourself!

These gorgeous Luminous Martini glasses are so beautiful! Use them to serve up special desserts, or your favorite icy beverage, Wine-a-Rita  for example. Pretty food served in pretty dishes...that's simply good design.

While you're at my website, be sure to look at the new Fall catalog from Willow House. Full of design tips, style inspiration, and fabulous things for your home, you'll want to place an order soon! Better yet, contact me and find out how to host a party and earn up to 70% off your favorite item in the catalog. Oh, and did I mention that it's double hostess rewards this month? Hurry! You can have a "virtual party" and earn the same benefits, with none of the work of having a real party. Contact me today and find out how!
Andy Schwartz-Willow House Catalog

Smokin' Sunday!

My husband is the KING of what we in Texas call "Aggie Engineering". In other words, he loves to remake and redo things in order to save money. (Sometimes that's actually a good thing). His latest project involved remaking an old, unused, little electric smoker that had been sitting out in our shed for probably 10 years or so. He was about to put it out at the curb, so he could purchase a new fancy-schmancy wood fired smoker, when his brain lit up, and that little, cheap lightbulb went off! Ding ding ding!!! He decided to retro fit that little old smoker himself. No fancy- schmancy needed here! No sirree! He found some directions online, (which I have since searched for and can't find) and was able to make a perfectly fine, perfectly sized, little smoker, just fit for two! I have to say. It's been AWESOME! No need to heat up my kitchen in this Texas heat! Yay! This Sunday, he smoked a brisket, and I just have to share his rub recipe.
2 T. Sugar
2 T. Kosher Salt
3 tsp. brown sugar
2 tsp. smoked paprika
1 tsp. chili powder
1 tsp. fresh chopped oregano
1 tsp. ground cumin
1/2 tsp. garlic powder
1/4 tsp. cayenne pepper

On Saturday night, he sprinkled the rub onto the brisket and rubbed it in realllllly good. He wrapped it up in foil and it stayed in the fridge all night. Gettin' all spicy and stuff... Then on Sunday, out to the smoker it went. Daisy supervised. She's good like that.

He placed it on our little bitty smoker.

Daisy watched. She takes this smokin' business very seriously. She is hugging that little bit of shade by the fence! Poor baby...so hot right now. Ugh...

He had been soaking some apple wood chips for hours, and that's what he placed onto the already hot fire, to create the smoke. He just checked on the smoker periodically, placing new chips onto the fire. That smoke is the key to great barbecue!

Can you smell that smoke? That is pure deliciousness. I wish you had smell-o-vision.

Here's that beautiful brisket, after hanging out in the smoker for about 5 hours.

Oh yeah.

Sliced up and ready to devour. It was so tender and juicy and ridiculously good. I swear. It just made me Texas barbecue proud! Yum-yum!

I served it with a "semi-homemade" pasta salad. I just made a boxed pasta salad mix, and whisked in one generous tablespoon of prepared Basil Pesto to the dressing. I added the last of my fresh Roma tomatoes (sigh) and some mozzarella cheese, black olives, thinly sliced red olives and fresh basil. I let that hang out in the fridge all day, and it was ready to enjoy by supper time.
Enjoy! Take time to smell the brisket...